Nov. 3, Saturday. At work yesterday I decided that I’d better ask Cindy what’s bothering her. To clear the air, ya know. Later, I had just finished eating supper and Cindy asked me to come in their room, “I want to talk with you.” I was quite surprised and curious. She proceeded to tell me how Dave wanted to wait until the weekend but she just couldn’t wait. “Now you’ve been here a week, and you can stay until next Thursday; that’ll have been 2 weeks. I’m sorry but we really can’t afford to have you stay here any longer.” I guess I hadn’t made it plain to them when and how long I was going to stay when I called from Harlingen. They thought I was going to rebuild my engine down there and come up this way in the spring. She went into too much detail about how broke they were and how they barely have enough money for their vacation back to MN in a couple weeks. She told how her relationships with Dave and Davy were being strained and she couldn’t even eat with me or look at me, so she finally had to say something. I told her, “I’m glad you did. I wish you would have earlier.” I also said that I didn’t really understand what it takes to keep a young family going. And she said she couldn’t understand wanting to travel like I am. “We don’t want you to feel like we’re kicking you out. After all, you’re family and all. But you have chosen to travel the way you are, just like we have chosen to have a family.” I told her that I guess I’ve made a mistake in not being explicit in talking with them and not planning ahead enough. She said maybe I will learn something out of all this. That’s true.
After this discussion I felt like I had to do something. I called my mom, collect, and asked her to send me a money order for $100, if I have that much. And while talking with her I remembered that my cousin, Paul Shelton, lives in Dallas. So my “plan” was to look him up today. But my check didn’t come in the mail and now I don’t know what to do. I’m out of money and gas until Monday at least. I’ve made a lot of mistakes that have led me up to this point. I guess all that I can do is wait until some money shows up. Maybe I’ll finally do some painting.
So here I sit in Dallas, Texas, after travelling half-way around the country, at a temporary stand-still. I have filled the pages of my second journal and don’t have the money to buy another. Optimism and patience are now necessary.